Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but he emptied himself, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. - Philippians 2:4
If you want relationships to thrive, act like Jesus. Covenant community is built on trust in Jesus, and not people. I had a dear friend who played a significant role in the Foursquare denomination for many years. I met with him one time and he said something which took me by surprise. He said, “Jon, here’s the thing that I’ve learned about relationships that has helped me more than anything else. I’ve learned that I don’t trust anybody.” And I said, “That sounds like an issue to me.” And this is what he said, “I’ve learned that the minute I make somebody the source of my hope, or my peace, or my security, and put all of my trust in them, inevitably, they’re imperfect. But if I put all my trust in Jesus; my hope, my sense of peace and security, and find my identity in Jesus first and foremost, then I will not be sucking the life out of people, but I can be pouring life into people. And when they fail, which they inevitably will, and so will I, my foundation isn’t rocked, because it’s built on Jesus and not them.”
Some of us are stuck in a free-fall emotionally, because somebody has left us or abandoned us or filed for divorce, or a friend has abandoned us, or we moved and now we don’t know anybody, or our boss promised us a promotion, and now we don’t even have a job. I want to lovingly suggest that , if you find yourself in that place, had we not put so much stock, so much trust, so much faith in a person to “save” us, when they turned out not to be Jesus Christ, our world might not feel so much like it is falling apart. Please know that, when we face abandonment and betrayal, we have to mourn. That’s painful. But if we can’t ever begin to climb out of that free-fall, we need to stop and say, “Am I trying to hold somebody in the position of savior, knowing full well, only Jesus can be that for me?” If that’s the case, we have to start by repenting and recognizing there’s been an idol in our lives. Remember, idols always over-promise and under-deliver. It doesn’t matter how far or how long you’ve been free-falling – you may have jumped out of that plane at 30,000 feet, and you’re like 5 feet from the ground – the moment you call on the name of Jesus, it is never too late for him to save you.